silverhawk79: (Default)
[personal profile] silverhawk79
I've been thinking a lot lately about what the point of all this is. About why I'm bothering to continue in this life. And it's led me to some very, very dark places.

I'm starting to come out of that, of course, because I have to. Because I fight it every day. But it has also make me think about the petty mess that my life has become. My connections with people vary from loose and shallow to deep and profound, as most people's do. The shallow ones, I'm thinking about abandoning for the most part, because they don't serve me anymore. They keep me distracted from what matters.

The deep and profound ones are with a handful of people, and I have, lately, found myself not connecting with even those people as I should.

So I'm taking steps to correct that. I don't want to have conversations anymore about the weather or what's on TV. I want to talk poetry, music, art, philosophy, religion, science, love. I want to know who or what hurt you so badly that you shy away from particular topics so that you don't cry in public. I want to know why you have the ideas you have-- but also, what ideas you have about changing the world or your place in it. I want to know everything that makes you, you.

Tell me everything under your name in the module, and I promise you, I will do the same.

Date: 2017-03-25 07:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I'm so with you in the connections department! It's hard - I fight wanting to have connections with people (for the long term) with also wanting alone time (in the short term).

if you ever want to talk deep stuff, I am but a call/click away.

Tell me everything under your name in the module, and I promise you, I will do the same.
Since you can't read FB/LJ every life at the moment = throwing myself into work (thinking of switching work positions while the praise is high)+figuring out hobbies now that I leave work at 6PM + reeling from my cousin's / childhood best friend's death + starting a new non-diet "diet" (book called the Diet Cure).


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